Sleep better: delay your bedtime!
So what you think I might be about to write is …don’t delay bedtime but I’m not.
Why? Because, research shows that lying awake in bed, stressing about not sleeping, is actually counter-productive to sleep, and if we force ourselves to go to bed too early that can end up being exactly what we do.
But naturally, it is more nuanced than that. Yes, it’s better to hit the sack sleepy, but if we're suffering from a tendency to over-stimulating activities later in the day, then waiting for sleepiness isn’t enough. We do need to adjust our daytime routine too.
Here are my seven sleep tips:
1/ Sleep isn’t just about what you do in the evening. It’s about how you start your day. If you, like many ADHDers, struggle to get started in the morning, kick-start your sleep-wake cycle (your circadian rhythm) as soon as possible by getting out in natural light for 15 to 20 mins as close to getting up as possible.
This triggers a cortisol boost in the morning that will get you going, see-sawing into a melatonin boost (sleep hormone) rise later in the day so that evenings cue sleep.
2/ What you do in the day is important too. As ADHDers, we can struggle with self-monitoring - how am I feeling/ what do I need? in any given moment. Checking in with yourself during the day, allows you to understand if you’re taking care of your physical, mental and emotional needs so you don’t end up frazzled and buzzing at the end of the day. Or prone to revenge bedtime procrastination because your day has been so frantic that there’s no way you’re going to deprive yourself of a long evening.
3/ Create a transition from daytime to evening activities. Decide when an ideal winddown time is, and DO something to signal the shift. This is a physiological shift. The goal is to change your state from on to off. The doing will be whatever brings you into your body - a walk, playing with a pet, a creative pursuit, immersing yourself in nature, dancing, breathwork. Create a routine or ritual around this so that you’re body and mind start to crave this opportunity to decompress.
4/ Observe your evening activities - notice when you’re doing/ finishing an activity how it’s made you feel. Are there some clues there? Strong emotional responses, physical responses, feeling on edge or overwhelmed can be a sign that what you’re choosing to do is ramping you up rather than winding you down. Prioritise activities that help you to switch off.
5/ Brain dump your worries - get a pad and paper out and create a stream of consciousness on the page. Whatever’s worrying you, dump it on paper. You can always rip it up and throw it away. Air your concerns so they don’t leave you lying awake.
6/ Switch the lights off! Coming back to the sleep hormone melatonin - encourage the production by limiting light in the evenings - low lighting, screens on night mode (or not at all - even better).
7/ Finally - go to bed sleepy. If you feel tired, ride that wave. If you wake up in the night and are awake for more than 20 minutes, get up. You want to associate your bed with sleep. Bed is for sleep, sex, possibly light reading or journaling but definitely not for stressing, technology or TV. At first you may continue to go to bed late but gradually your sleepy time will creep forward as you put the right things in place during the day.